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3 interactions

June 16, 2010

1. In the mall, after work at about 10 pm, I’m walking down the hall and 4 guys are wlaking my way. I keep my head up, but don’t make eye contact with any of them and just walk straight ahead. I don’t feel like being harassed. One of them asks how I am, and I curtly say “fine.” Then I realize that these boys may have been nice people. They may have been asking to be polite, instead of to follow up with some rude comment. I felt bad for judging them instantly in such a negative way.

2. I was later in the diner, paying for my food. Andy and Ryan had already paid their share and walked outside. The owner looks at me and says, “How did this happen?”
I responded, “How did what happen?”
“When I was young, women were forbidden to pay for their own food.”
A server chimed in with, “It depends on the man. Some of us are still like that.”
I smiled and said, “Well, I like paying for my own food. It makes me feel like a real person.”

3. While walking home from DVA at the end of my evening, wearing shorts, a men’s button down, and a vest, a passing car slowed down near me. One boy inside yelled somethingunintelligible , and the other yelled “SLUT!” They sped away. I felt uncomfortable in my clothes, in my skin, and in my neighborhood. I just wanted to be inside and away from these assholes. It’s interactions like this one that make the first one happen. And the thing is that I don’t understand it at all. Why would you do that? I wish I could ask. Why would you yell something so offensive at someone just walking around in her own neighborhood? She’s a person and you’ve ruined her evening, not to mention given her another reason not to talk to anyone she doesn’t know. I shouldn’t have to feel unsafe in my own neighborhood, nor should I have to feel like I can’t dress for the weather without being attacked.

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One comment

  1. This one time during Gallery Hope a bunch of girls thrusted a stuffed animal in my face and make some kind of gurgly noise to scare me. At first I was embarrassed and then I realized that they did that to everyone and I felt better. Maybe those boys were just yelling slut out the window at some interval.



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